Hmm, holidays. They're filled with family and friends. Love and relaxation. Or at least they're supposed to. I always feel lousy after holidays. I recal how phoney I've been, how much I've pretended to care, pretended to enjoy myself. In all honesty, I don't really like family, or people in general. Except for a rare few people, I can stand moments with others but not much more than that. I guess I'm just in a mood right now. I feel alone and guilty, but I don't know why

Like tuxedo colored sauseges.

holee shitpod mirtel.

I just started watching the march of the penguins. It is the cutest goddamn thing I have ever seen. I wish I had someone to share the obnoxious amounts of cute with.

first draft poem

There is a fist,
a fist wrapped in blood
It pounds at you and pounds at you
it hits you again and again.
It's pounding disfigures you,
it breaks you.
but you stand up in spite of it.
Then it misses, and you stagger.
Then it stops and you fall down.
Have you ever seen a human heart?
It looks like a fist wrapped in blood.